Tuesday, October 12, 2010

I'm a...what?

In the past little while I've taken on a few new identities, and while they've been good to me, I suppose, I'm having an identity complex right now with these newer identities.

I'm a sociologist...right? Aren't I? Haven't I put in three years of school and am planning to put in two more years just to prove that I am a sociologist?

I'm a grad student...or am I? Well, technically I am, because I'm taking graduate courses, but do I really want to be a grad student? Is it worth it?

I'm a researcher...I do lots of research, at least, and I see that it is important, and I can come up with good ideas, yet do I really care that much about it?

I'm an academic...or am I? Knowledge is important, and I want to keep acquiring it, but do I really want to be a part of the "professional academic world"?

I'm a young single adult...and I don't want to be, but do I really have a choice? It is hard to ask guys out without them getting scared off, and sometimes it is hard to get guys to ask me out, mostly because I'm "old" and a grad student in a place where most of the guys and girls around me still have a few years left of their undergrad. So I'm a young single adult...but I don't want to be.

I don't really know what else I am these days, and I am struggling with how I feel about all of this. How I feel about some things is clearer than how I feel about others, but mostly I just don't really know what I'm doing.

Maybe I'm not really struggling at all with it; maybe I'm just creating a problem where there wasn't one, like the "crisis" in social psychology in the 1960s-1970s. (Hey, at least we know I am learning stuff in grad school...but once again, do I care about it? Does it really matter? What am I doing here?)

4 comments:

  1. Bri I love you! Hang in there, I too am struggling with this new grad student scenario. Keep your chin up! xoxo Bisous, Haleigh

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  2. I think that those are healthy questions to ask yourself. We all ought to analyze the roles that we find ourselves in throughout our lives. I, for one, think that you are my talented, intelligent, and witty cousin. That's the role I have YOU in currently. :D

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  3. I am in the exact same spot when it comes to grad school. There are a lot of times that I wonder if it is really what I want to be doing right now or at all. Let me know if there is anything I can do for you, I'm always a phone call away!

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  4. You are a brilliant, sweet, very caring, and personable young woman, who has varied and amazing talents. You are a grad student and a sociologist. You are a researcher. You are an example to your family and your nieces and nephews. You are a Christian, and a valiant instrument in the Hands of the Lord. You are an amazing, giving friend. And you are (my favorite roll) my daughter. Oooo. And someday, some lucky guy's wife.

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